Thriving in 2014

Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters
          Isaiah 55:1a



Here we are with just a couple days left in 2014. Are you a resolution maker? Do you keep them? I don't usually make new resolutions, but I do reevaluate where I'm at, where I want to be and new routines I want to get into to. I do this in September (beginning of the school year) and New Years.

Last year I was presented with the idea of choosing a word for the year. I thought it was an excellent idea to almost have a theme to live by. My word for 2013 was "Real" and I think I did pretty good with staying real in my relationships and how I dealt with life.

As I've sat back and tried to hear what God wants me to focus on for 2014, I was stumped. Then I stumbled onto the new song by Casting Crowns "Thrive. Have a listen.

I was so impacted the message of this song that I quickly pulled out my Bible and looked Isaiah 55:1 that talked about who is thirsty and coming to the waters. I am thirsty for more of The Lord and I want to surrender 2014 to Him and whatever it brings.

So my word and theme song for 2014 is "Thrive". Thriving in my relationship with The Lord. Thriving in where He has placed me to minister to others. Thriving in how I impact the world in His name

I encourage you to listen to what word The Lord wants for you to embrace for 2014. Once you know, share it with your friends and comment here, write it down, journal it!

Many blessings for the coming year!

Mercy at Christmas

Because judgement without mercy will be shown to anyone who has not been merciful. Mercy triumphs over judgement!
             James 2:13



It's that time of year again, where we're faced with parties, busy shopping malls, school pageants and the family gatherings. These things can combine to make the next week one of the most stressful times of the year instead of the most wonderful time of year.

Even though my calendar is not full and all the presents are purchased, I still have a lot of stress over what's going to happen next week. Will the gifts be acceptable. Will we be able to fit everybody's wants into the time frame we have. Will I be able to eat healthy while surrounded by goodies. My list could go on and on.

But this year, I'm trying a different approach. I'm trying to look at all the events and people I encounter with mercy instead of judgement. As I read the above verse from James, I was convicted by the thought that if I don't show mercy, none will be shown to me.

Now I don't mean to say that if you're merciful to everybody who is pushing their way into the check-out line at Wal-Mart that you will achieve success in getting to the line quicker. But what if you did show mercy to your fellow shoppers? I think you would see a change in your own heart, even if they do not respond in kind. And what about that family gathering that is happening next week? What if you kept quiet about some of the things that you see wrong and instead, just enjoyed watching others smile.

These are things that I need to hear, probably more than any of you. I'm going to approach this next week with the mercy of God towards others and allow Him to do this work in my heart, because I can't do it without His help.


As we wrap up 2013, I want to thank each and every one of you for taking time to read my blog. May this Christmas be full of the hope and joy that Christ brings. Merry Christmas!!!

Failing Forward

- Failure is the state or condition of not meeting a desirable or intended objective, and may be viewed as the opposite of success.



This morning, I was watching my 6 month old son trying to crawl. He pushes himself up onto his hands and tries to lift his tummy off the ground. Sometimes he gets frustrated and starts to cry, but the more and more he tries, he longer he is able to hold himself up. It's not easy to watch my kids try something new. As the parent, I want to jump in and help because it's not easy watching them fall down or get frustrated. But in the case of my son learning to crawl, he has to learn to do it himself.

As I was watching my son, I started thinking about Renee Swope's book, A Confident Heart, and Chapter 7 titled "When Doubt Whispers 'I'm such a failure'."

When I watch my children try something new or practice to get better at a skill, I would never call them a failure. Finding what you are good at or learning to walk, for instance, are just a part of growing up. A child learning to walk takes time and more than likely, is going to fall before they are steady on their feet, or borrow Renee's phrase, failing forward.

As I look back at my own life and what I consider failing, I remember the disappointment of my first driving test. I remember the big "D" on my first history (my favorite subject) paper of high school. I remember sitting on the floor crying when my oldest hit the terrible two stage and I seemed to be losing the battle of yet another tantrum.

But in all of these instances, I learned something valuable. With each test, paper and day with my child, I learned from the mistakes I had previously made.

There have also been times when God has allowed me to struggle with a sin or difficult person, to the point of exhaustion. I've cried out to him in confession and pleading to help me. But as I do with my own children, He allowed me to struggle. I believe He has used these times to build patience, perseverance and kindness.

God doesn't look at me as a failure, but He does allow me to fail to help me attain something He wants me to learn. As Renee says in her book "Failure pushes us to do more than we think we can and try other methods of doing things when one way doesn't work. Failure can be hurtful, but it can also be beneficial."

For Me Or Against Me

If God is for us, who can be against us?
               Romans 8:31b



"I am never going to be a good enough ____________."

If you're like me, you've filled in that blank more times than you can count. And more often than I like to admit, I'm comparing myself to someone else. Someone more virtuous, more graceful, more beautiful, more...

As I read Chapter 6 in A Confident Heart by Renee Swope, I was challenged to replace all of these statements against myself, or AM, that doubt whispers to me on a daily basis with statements for me, or FM. The FM statements are God's promises to me.

At first I thought, I don't need to do this. I know enough of His promises to me and have the knowledge of when to apply them. But then I had to stop. Obviously I wasn't applying God's promises FM because I was still facing many doubts on a daily, if not hourly, basis.

As I sat down to write out my AM/FM statements, I thought of my daughters. They love to dress up in princess dresses and will often come twirl for me. They will occasionally ask "Am I beautiful, Mommy?" And I rave over how beautiful the are, but I also work really hard at explaining to them that what makes them beautiful is not what they wear, but who they are and how they treat others.

At that moment, God whispered to me,"Don't you think I want you to know the truth about what makes you beautiful? Don't you think that I want you to dwell on my promises and not the lies doubt tells you? I want to show you how much I value you."

Those thoughts from God changes my perspective on the AM/FM statements. So here are some my AM/FM statements.



When doubt tells me that I'll never be good enough, I will cling to the promise that God will complete the good work He started in me. (Philippians 1:6)

When I feel like no one likes me, I will remember that I have been chose by God and adopted as His child. (Ephesians 1:3-8)

When I feel like I'll never be the Christian that I feel I need to be to please God, I will trust that I am free from condemnation and cannot be separated from God's love. (Romans 8:1-2, 31-39)



The same way I want only good things to fill the minds of my chldren about who they are and what truly matters, God wants me to remember His Truths and do away with the doubts of this world.

Who am I?

I am a precious and chosen child of the King. If God is for me, then no one can be against me.

So who are you?

Feeling the Unfailing Love

How priceless is your unfailing love, O God! People take refuge in the shadow of your wings.

                      Psalm 36:7

Unfailing love is almost considered an oxymoron in our society these days. The love that most people know fails, cheats, lies, abuses, degrades and has conditions. It serves only selfish purposes and does not offer any protection or care.

This is why the priceless, unfailing love of God is not easy to comprehend for most people, myself included. Even if you are accustomed to good relationships with people you love, our human love is not perfect and it does fail because we fail.

But the beauty of God's love is that no matter what I do, what I accomplish or how I look, He will never love me any more or any less than the day He sent Jesus to die on the cross for my sins. Do you believe that? Do you live as if you believe it?

After reading Renee Swope's A Confident Heart, her statement on page 54 that says "I needed the knowledge of His unfailing love to move from my head to my heart," was something that jumped out at me. I know that feeling. 

I have never known life without the knowledge of God's love for me and I value having been taught that from an early age. But because it's something that I've known of for so long, I have often felt that God and His love for me are not necessarily something I feel deeply in my heart. 

And I know that I'm not alone in this. I've had people that have been Christians for both a long time and a short time express the same concerns to me. They ask me, "How do I feel God's love and a love for Him?" To be honest, I don't have any easy answers. 

But this I do know. God desires to have a relationship with me. He wants me to be on fire for Him. He wants me to yearn to spend time with him daily. He wants to be my very best friend and be in constant communication with me. So because I trust that He wants me in all those ways, I know that if I study His Word and pray to Him, expressing my desire to "feel", He will be faithful in helping me get to that place. 

I can see Him doing this in my life, slowly and surely. And He will do it for you too! So surround yourself in the promises of God. Talk to Him. Tell Him your concerns, fears and struggles. He won't fail you or fail to love you. 

Surrounded With The Truth

But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship him.
                John 4:23


Do you struggle with self-doubt, insecurity and feelings of worthlessness? I do. I've blogged about this topic before, but it's worth revisiting because I think it's a very common problem, especially among women. And it's something I have to deal with every day of my life.

It's so easy to pin our value as a person on what we accomplish, how we dress or who our friends are. But as I've been reading and studying A Confident Heart by Renee Swope, I've unearthed some of the hard truths about my insecurities and doubts.

I've discovered that one of my earliest doubts was whether or not I was going to be safe. I've learned that my insecurities keep me from being myself and having fun. I don't know what it's like not to worry if I'm good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, etc. And that I'm scared. Scared of being radically different.

I'm sure some of your own doubts and insecurities are popping up in your mind now. They may be to a lesser degree than mine are, but none the less, they hinder you in some way. And if you're like me, you may feel overwhelmed just thinking about what you feel hinders you.

But stay with me!

We don't have to stay in this place. We don't have to sentence ourselves to living never feeling like we're enough. Because above everything we doubt and dislike about ourselves, and what we think others doubt and dislike about us, is the truth.

The truth is not what we think, what others think, but what God thinks. God tells me I'm a masterpiece (Isa 62:3). He tells me I'm never alone (Deut. 31:6). He tells me I'm precious (Isa 43:4).

But do I believe Him? Do I live like I believe Him? Honestly, no. I know I believe Him a bit more than I did last year at this time, but I still have a long way to go. Each day is a battlefield in my mind, so I've chosen to surround myself with truth.

How? I'm taking it one step at a time. This week, when I encountered a truth that I felt God wanted me to believe about myself, I wrote it on a heart sticky note and placed it around my bathroom mirror.

How will you apply God's truth to your life and take steps toward believing who you really are?

Because You Say So

Do everything without compaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life--in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing.
                          Philippians 2:14-16


I have been a parent now for almost five and a half years. I know there are so many more parents out there with much more expereience then myself, so please bear with me. In that five and a half years, the one thing I am most convinced of is that God gave me children so that I could grow. When I'm dealing with my oldest and she is questioning why I am asking her to pick up the toys that she is just going to play with tomorrow and she sees no reason why I should ask her to do work now, all I can hear in my head is myself asking God why He's asking me to "give in" to  be nice to someone I really don't want to be nice to.  See the irony of that? I do. And there are so many other examples that I could tell you about.

In the verses I've quoted above, it talks about doing everything without complaining or arguing. I remember memorizing this verse as a kid with Steve Green and his "Hide 'Em In Your Heart" tapes that had verses set to music. Flashback for some of us, right? Anyway, as a kid I took these verses to mean that I had to bite my tongue and do what was asked of me no matter what. But as I've grown, I see that there is so much more than just doing what I'm told. Paul is encouragng us to live as shining examples in a generation that is lost and crooked. Doesn't that describe the world today?

This week in my study of What Happens When Women Say Yes to God by Lysa TerKeurst, she talked about the story in Luke 5:1-11 when Jesus called Peter, Andrew, James and John as disciples. These men were fisherman by trade and were coming to shore after a long night of fruitless fishing on the Lake of Gennesaret. On the shore, Jesus was speaking to a crowd that was pressing in on Him, so He climbed into Peter's boat to continue teaching. He then asked Peter to push the boat out from shore a bit. Verse 4 of chapter 5 says "When he had finished speaking, he said to Simon (Peter), "Put out into deep water, and let down the nets for a catch." Now remember, these men had just come in from fishing all night, but notice how Peter responds to Jesus. "Simon answered, 'Master, we've worked hard all night and haven't caught anything. But because you say so, I will let down the nets.' " And guess what, their nets were filled so full with fish that it began to sink their boats.

Now you're thinking, that's fine for Peter, but what about my life where I think I'm doing what God wants only to be wallowing in more trouble and lack of fulfillment. I wonder what would happen, myself included, if our hearts were more like Peter's and said, without hesitation and question, "Because you say so, Jesus". We get so focused on needing to know the end result or the "why" like my five year-old, that we ignore the fact that God has the ultimate plan.

So many times I am guilty of doing just that. Arguing with God. Complaining that He doesn't understand how hard it is for me to let go of something or someone. How scared I am to speak to someone about Him. But why do I argue then wonder why I feel like I'm missing out on something? Maybe it's because I am. Peter's life was the perfect example of how doing one simple act of obedience that made no sense to him, changed the course of his life.  He didn't complain or argue, and he was a shining example to all those in his generation. Yes, he struggled at times, even denied Christ in the hours before His crucifiction, but God took all Peter's experiences and used them to help him eventually lived boldly for The Lord and helped establish the early Church.

So is there something God is calling you to do, but you're asking why or telling Him that is doesn't make sense? Do everything without complaining or arguing isn't just a good mantra that we tell our kids. Let us lead by example when God is calling us to obey and stay focused on Jesus.

Wholly Committed

Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. "Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened." But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord.
              1 Peter 3:13-15a


Committment. It's a word that strikes fear into the hearts of many people. I believe that's why there are so many couples living together before marriage, or instead of getting married. Oh they say it's so they can "test drive" the relationship, but deep down, they are scared of being committed to someone.  Comittiment is easy when things in the relationship are going well, but I find it very interesting that so many couples who have "test drove" their relationship for many years, end up divorcing not long after the marriage license is signed.

And me in my self-rightous attitude used to think I was not afraid of committment. But as it says in Proverbs 16:18, "Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall."

As the Proverbs 31 online study of What Happens When Women Say Yes to God by Lysa TerKeurst looked at Chapter 4 this week, Lysa dug deeper into the concept of radical obedience that I wrote about last week. And true to form, God is pinpointing the areas that I think I don't need to work on.  He is revealing to me how disobeying and falling short in one area of my life points back so closely to my committment level.

Why did I think for so long that I didn't have a committment problem? God is showing me that it's because I wasn't actually committing or obeying in the fulness that He requires.

So why is committing to God such a scary thing? Am I scared of getting physically or emotionally hurt? Scared of what others will think? Fear of the unknown? Peter addresses those reasons in the verses above. But he calls us to set our hearts apart Christ as Lord. And that is exactly what I think holds us back. At least it is for me.

It's the putting Christ and His ways as the only priority of my heart. And what exactly is my heart? In the Hebrew culture of the Bible, the heart was credited with being the center or core of a personality. It was the spiritual center and your life flowed from there. Your heart defines you, determines who you are, how you think, and what you do.  All of your emotions, motives and will come from your heart and it reflects your true identity.  That is why Proverbs 4:23 says to guard your heart above all else.

Our natural tendencies, or our sinful nature, doesn't want to be stifled or controlled by anything other than our wants and desires. And that's what makes being wholly committed to God scary to me, and so many others. And it's also why I believe so many people like to "test drive" their relationship with God. They don't want to be committed to Him in all areas of their heart because it might mean they have to give up something.

But being wholly committed to God is where I want to be. I want to be a woman who doesn't have to think twice about being wholly committed to God in every area of my heart.

What about you? Are you testing driving your relationship with God and holding back your heart from Him instead of setting it apart for Christ?

Radical Obedience

Prepare your mind for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace given you when Jesus Christ is revealed. As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you in holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: "Be holy, because I am holy."
                1 Peter 1:13-16


What do you think of when I say the word radical? Do images of political rallies, planes crashing into buildings and riots pop into your head? Those are my first thoughts too. But today, I want to change your view of radical.

Do you know what the definition of radical is? It is favoring extreme changes in existing views, habits, conditions, or institutions. And yes, in many instances it is a way to describe the examples in the above paragraph. But what if radical was a way to define your odedience to God?

This week in my study of What Happens When Women Say Yes to God by Lysa TerKeurst, I was challenged to live in radical obedience. At first I thought, "You've got to be kidding. Radical doesn't fit into my life. I've got kids to think about. And laundry. And dishes. And..." It was definelty a time when I said "Say what?"

But the more I thought about it and gleaned from other ladies taking this online bible study from Proverbs 31, the more I was convicted to turn towards radical obedience. You see, radical obedience is something that should define every Christian. We should be radically different from the world around us. Like the verses above from 1 Peter, we should be self-controlled, put our hope in Christ, not give in to evil desires and be holy. None of those remind me of the way the world lives.

But where am I on the obedience spectrum? Do I sway back and forth when it suits me?

My everyday life, as I described above, doesn't seem radical. And most would say that being radical as a mom isn't the best way to raise a family. But I think it's the best way to be a wife and mom. My family, above all others, should see that I live in radical obedience to God. They need to see that my life as a living example of the work of Christ. They need to see that living in radical obedience is not some hocus pocus, fruity-tooty way of living, but that its simply a way of turning everything I do into an opportunity for God to work in my life and the lives of those around me.

I have to be honest. I've had a really rough week. Between kids not listening, me having insomnia, back problems and housework that I can never seem to finish, I've felt very overwhelmed at times. And as I've written about before, my need to have everything appear perfect and in control gets out of control sometimes. But I know that Satan was trying to knock me to the ground because he doesn't like that I am doing this bible study and experience life changing biblical teaching. And it worked. He knocked me to my knees. But that is where I could best cry out to God and lift my open hands in surrender of my life. My home, my family, my need for approval, all that was surrendered to God. For me, it's radical surrender. It's not something that is a one time surrender, but a surrender I need to do every day in radical obedience to God.

So what is God calling you to surrender to Him in radical obedience? No, it won't be easy, but it will be freeing. As Lysa says in her book, "One thing you can be assured of is that God has already worked out all the details of what your obedience will accomplish--and it is good. We need not fear what our obedience will cause to happen in our life. We should only fear what our disobedience will cause us to miss."

Who's Driving?

Listen, O Israel! The Lord is our God, The Lord alone. And you must love The Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength.
           Deuteronomy 6:4&5  NLT

Attention, Israel! God, our God! God the one and only! Love God, your God, with your whole heart; love Him with all that's in you, love him with all you've got!
          Deuteronomy 6:4&5  MSG



Have you ever been a passenger in a vehicle with someone who is a really bad driver? If your riding in a taxi, you just hang on for dear life and pray you make it to your destination alive. But if it's a friend or family member, you might offer to take over for them, and cringe when they say "I'm an excellent driver! What's your problem?"

As I started digging into the verse of the week from my latest Proverbs 31 online bible study, "What Happens When Women Say Yes to God" by Lysa Terkeurst, a fellow study girlfriend used the analogy of God in the driver seat of our lives. I thought it was a fantastic and here's why.

In the verses in Deuteronomy that I have quoted above, Moses is calling for a commitment to The Lord from the children of Israel and telling them how to do this. He's telling them that nothing else can have their heart, give passion to their soul and fuel their strength. Later on in Deuteronomy, he details to them what will happen if the follow The Lord and what will happen if they don't.

I often get frustrated when reading passages like this in the Old Testament because I know that the nation of Israel strays from following The Lord.  They allow the gods of other nations to take the place of the one true God in their lives. Even after they experienced miracles, signs and the fulfillment of prophecy.

But yet as I get frustrated with God's people, He reminds me that I have not always let Him be in the driver's seat of my own life. I have allowed other gods a turn at the wheel. And by gods I mean selfishness, materialism, jealousy and so many more that I could list. I've let other things and people become my heart, passion and drive. I've worked off my own strength and not depended on Him.

So this is my question to myself, and you.

What do I need to get rid of in order for God to be the only driver in my life? And what's keeping me from doing that?

If I'm honest with myself, I'm afraid of what will happen. I'm afraid of what others will think. Will they make fun of me? Will I being thought of as being prideful? Arrogant? I'm afraid of where God will take me. But if Jesus did what God asked Him to do, and His obedience saved me, then I need to put God back in the drivers seat of my life.

Who is in your drivers seat?

Christian Criteria

So how do we fit what we know of Abraham, our first father in the faith, into this new way of looking at things? If Abraham, by what he did for God, got God to approve him, he could certainly have taken credit for it. But the story we're given is a God-story, not an Abraham-story. What we read in Scripture is, "Abraham entered into what God was doing for him, and that was the turning point. He trusted God instead of trying to be right on his own."
If you're a hard worker and do a good job, you deserve your pay; we don't call your wages a gift. But if you see that the job is too big for you, that it's something only God can do, and you trust him to do it--you could never do it for yourself no matter how hard and long you worked--well, that trusting-him-to-do-it is what gets you set right with God, by God. Sheer gift
                  Romans 4:1-5 (The Message)



When I was in high school, I remember enjoying writing reports and doing projects. Maybe that's why history and english were my favorite subjects. I would get excited when the teacher would hand out the criteria for an assignment. Yes, I'm a geek and know it. But, if the teacher said we could write on whatever we wanted and that there was no specific criteria, I always panicked a little bit. Why, because I liked knowing exactly what I had to do to get an "A" on my paper.

I'm still someone who likes to know the criteria for a project. When it comes to my Christian walk, I admit that I can very easily get focused on the "criteria". And we all have Christian criteria in our heads. That list that we go through each time we are faced with the question, "What does God want from me?", and then we jump to find out who needs a meal or what organization needs money.

Now let me be clear, making meals and giving money are not bad things. In fact, most of the things on our Christian criteria lists are extremely good things and wonderful ways of serving. But who are we really serving? God? Others? Or self.

We can get so caught up in doing the next right thing or checking off our list of Christian criteria that we forget to listen to God. And I mean really listen to what He wants from us. Serving Him by taking meals, serving on committees, or giving money are all wonderful things, if that is truly what He is telling you to do. But what if all God wants from you today is your attention. Picture Him sitting in your living room, waiting for you to come sit with Him, while you run around checking off your list of Christian criteria.

I have been guilty of doing just that, far too often. Would I do that to my husband? No way! But why do I do it to the God of the universe, when all He wants it for me to spend time with Him, trusting Him and putting my faith in Him. Because let's be honest, when I scurry around fulfilling my list of Christian criteria, I'm putting my faith in my own abilities and focusing more on making myself feel like I've accomplished something that makes me look better in God's eyes. But in that, I'm forgetting what Paul wrote about in  Romans 4:1-5.  Too often I get caught up in doing things for God, when I need to just spend time with God and find out what He really wants from me.

I will never be able to complete my own list of Christian criteria, and neither will you. Today, spend some time with God and ask Him what He wants from you.  Maybe, just maybe, it's your attention.

Getting Away From Going Through The Motions

And I said: "Woe is me! For I am lost; for I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips; for my eyes have seen the King, The Lord of hosts!"
                Isaiah 6:5 ESV



Have you ever felt like you are going through the motions of life?  More specifically, the Christian life?  I think a lot of us, if we're honest, would say yes.  Oh, we go through the motions of loving others, loving God, serving Him and living with all the "right" morals.  In other words, from the outside, life looks good.  All sunshine and roses.

But what is going on inside isn't so nice.  We have inner turmoil that most of the time we can ignore, but those questions keep plaguing us.  Do I really know God?  Do I really know how to love God and others? How is a Christian supposed to feel?  Why is my heart numb and calloused? How am I different than every other moral person?

Isaiah had a similar life before encountering God in Isaiah chapter 6. I don't know if he ever asked himself these questions, but he had a concept of who God was, as any good Jew should.  He also knew that he was supposed to serve God, which is probably why he was in the temple, going through the motions of his duties as one of the aristocracy of Jerusalem.  (Doesn't that sound like a lot of us, going about our duties in the church or charities?)

But on this particular day, God chose to reveal Himself and take Isaiah's nice, cushy life in a whole new direction.  Isaiah came face to face with the harsh reality of his own sinfulness and pride.  But even more importantly, God in all His glory and majesty, became a reality. (I encourage you to read all of Isaiah chapter 6.) From this day forward, Isaiah followed the call of God, prophesying God's word to the people of Judah, and lived a life that was not cushy.

Ultimately, I think living a life of "motions" does boil down to the first question: do I really know God?  So if that's the problem, what is the solution?  

Like Isaiah, we need an encounter with God, where He goes from being a concept to a reality.  Our encounter won't look like Isaiah's, but will be exactly what we need to change our beliefs and priorities; taking us from living for ourselves to living for Him.

Are you still confused about how to have an encounter with God?  I believe that if you take the time to spend in God's Word, pray to Him to become real to you, you will encounter Him.  He wants us to seek Him.  So why would He ignore your request?  But be prepared that your life will no longer be the same. 

More Than A Consultant

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy.  I came that they may have life and have it abundantly."
                      John 10:10 ESV



I was talking the other day to someone who is contemplating a career change.  This person isn't sure what to do, but knows he needs a change.  I made the joke that if he could figure out what a consultant does, he could do that.  I thought it was a pretty good joke.

But this morning I was listening to a sermon by Timothy Keller and he used the illustration of how some people use Jesus as a consultant.  I thought this was a fantastic analogy.  But then a voice whispered to me, "Do you treat Jesus that way?"

I had been stopped in my tracks, and it got me thinking about what do people go to a consultant to gain.  Wisdom?  Direction?  Expertise?  So I went searching for the definition of a consultant; "a person who gives expert or professional advice".  That doesn't sound like a definition fit for The King of Kings, does it?

Unfortunately, though, I often approach Jesus that way.  I seek His advice on my ideas rather than seeking His Truths, His Will and His Answers.  I take what I think and "run it past him" as I would do a consultant.

Instead, I need to approach Jesus, My King, My Savior, My Redeemer with reverence, humbleness and a moldable heart.  Because if I don't, I'm falling short of living the life He wants for me.  And what kind of life does He want for me?  As John 10:10 states above, He wants to give me abundant life.  Some versions say rich and satisfying.

So if I am truly wanting to receive and life this rich, satisfying, abundant life that Jesus has for me, I need to approach Him as He truly is and not just a consultant in my life.

Blah Days

Do you ever go through times in your life when you feel like the blah version of yourself? Oh you continue on like nothing is really wrong and put on a good front for others to see, but in your head, you know that things aren't quite right.

And deep down, you know why things aren't right. Your relationship with God isn't your priority. You've let it slip down a few notches.  Even if you get around to reading your Bible, the words seem hollow. And your prayers? They become something you say by routine, if you bother to pray at all.

So what next. You know you have a problem; how do you fix it.  Some people would say to just "buck up" or "just get through it".  In my opinion, that's when you become numb to God and it your blah days can turn into blah years.

There was a time in my life when I was good at going through the motions. Good at covering up when I felt blah.  But that was a time in my life when I didn't have people in my life who I would trust enough to tell all my struggles too. Because let's face it, during those blah times, aren't you glad that those you come in contact with don't have ESP. So now, thanks to where God has led me in my life, I have close friends and family who I can be real with.  Real about all the internal struggles.  Who will pray with me when I can't find the words.

Now those blah times are much fewer and far between. But occasionally, they do come back. And I don't think they are always a bad thing. Because there is one thing that runs through my head during my blah days, "Is this what it's like without God?"  My blah days, I truly feel, are allowed my God to reveal to me how my neighbour who doesn't know him feels. It gives me a fresh perspective on the daily life of an unbeliever and how struggling through a day on my own strength without God feels.

So next time you have a day where you feel God is far away, remember that there is someone who lives that way every day and needs to hear about Jesus Christ.

The Great I Am

"Don't be afraid, for I am with you.  Don't be discouraged, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you.  I will hold you up with My victorious right hand." Isaiah 41:10 NLT


My little 2 year-old daughter will often say to me "Hold hand, mommy" with a quiet pleading in her voice.  She will say it as we are walking down stairs, in a busy place or sometimes even walking down the hallway in our home.  Sometimes she is just wanting to hold my hand for fun, while other times it's because she is nervous or afraid of something.  My almost 5 year-old does not ask to hold my hand as often.  She's more confident in herself walking down a set of stairs or walking beside me in a store, even though there are still times when she just wants to be close to me; wants to feel my presence.  

I look at the way each of my daughters needs me or reaches for me and can't help but compare their needs to how I need God. There are times when I, like my 2 year-old, will cling the Word of God, desperately needing Him close and soaking up His presence.  These are the times when I usually see and feel the danger of being pulled away from Him.  But there are times when I feel confident in myself, like my oldest daughter, and don't feel like holding on to the Lord's hand or clinging to Him.  I walk along, thinking that I see everything around me clearly and that although I know God is there if I need Him, I don't need to hold on to His hand.

But how many times do I not see the danger of not clinging to God, just like my oldest who might not see the car backing up as we walk through a parking lot or the patch of ice at the bottom of the steps.

As I read this verse from Isaiah, I usually take these truths and tuck them away for a day when I am afraid or discouraged or needing help.  But the truth of the matter is that every day, no matter if I "feel" like I need God to be there or not, He is there.  He already knows my day, my stresses, my upcoming struggles and He is already victorious over them.  And although I may not be able to anticipate them, even if I try to, He is with me and I need to hold on to His hand whether I feel confident in myself or not.  I need to have the attitude of my 2 year-old, who wants to enjoy holding my hand, even if there is not any danger that I can see or feel.

Because above all, He is victorious over all that could harm me today.  

Better Than I Do

"I wait quietly before God, for my victory comes from Him." - Psalms 62:1


Quiet time.  Right now, at this moment in my home, it is quiet.  The clock reads 9:29 pm and my two sleeping princesses have crashed for the night.  Hopefully it lasts until I'm ready for them to get up in the morning, but it might not.  That's one of the joys of motherhood, expecting the unknown.

As I sit here with my cup of tea, the silence almost feels overwhelming.  In a world where our lives are constantly bombarded with the sound of the phone ringing, music on the radio or ipod, dishwasher running, kids playing hide-and-seek and a miriad of other noises, I can honestly say that I'm not really comfortable with quiet anymore.  Are you?

Unfortunately, I think the noise of our society and lives is one of Satan's biggest weapons.  Why?  Because if you look at the verse from Psalm 62 quoted above, you'll see that when we wait quietly before God, we are victorious in The Lord.  So why wouldn't Satan use ever tactic he can think of to distract and muddle our minds with noise.  He doesn't want us to be victorious over anything.

Yet, amidst all Satan's distractions, we are called to be quiet.  How many times have you heard Psalm 46:10a quoted?  "Be still, and know that I am God!"  I even have it on a painting in my living room.

As a mom, I have struggled so many times with this, personally, in my life.  And after talking to countless other moms, I know I'm not the only one.  We struggle to stay awake if we do get a chance to sit still in a chair for 5 minutes because the baby started teething and kept us up half the night.  We are so desperate for adult conversation that if we get any "quiet", we jump on the phone to catch up with a friend or make that dentist appointment for our husband.  The receptionist at the dental office is an adult, so that counts as our adult conversation for the day.  We try to get up earlier than anyone else to enjoy the calm before the day, but in our morning fuzzy brain forget about that one floorboard that sqeakes and wakes up the toddler.

So is there an answer to finding quiet time with God as a mom of young, noisy blessings?  I think it comes down to this.  Who or what is our priority and what are we seeking to fill us?  Is it Facebook?  Is it a gossip magazine?  Is it Pinterest?  Unfortunately, I have to admit that I don't always utilize the time I do have.

I don't believe that God measures our devotion to Him by the amount of time we sit at the kitchen table in complete silence.  I do believe that He knows our lives, better than we do.  He knows our limitations and obstacles, better than we do.  He knows me, better than I do.  He knows what I have to face that day, better than I do.  He knows that I won't get to sit down until 9 pm, better than I do.

So why can't I find even five minutes with the One who knows, better than I do, the joys and sorrows ahead of me and also the One who gives me my victory.  As my clock now reads 10:01 pm, I'm going to end this post, and go utilize my time with the One who is my victory and knows my tomorrow, better than I do.

The Basics of God's Will

"Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you who belong to Christ Jesus."
                  1 Thessalonians 5:16-17

If you're like me, at one point in your life, you've probably tried to get into shape. You research different kinds of workout programs and meals plans to find the perfect one for you.  You watch the interviews of people who have successfully toned, sculpted and transformed their bodies.  You tell yourself that you can do this and look forward to the end result.

But what happens if you only do part of the program? If you ignore the meal plans, or only workout out 2 days a week versus the 6 days that are recommended, will your body get the results that are promised in the program?  Probably not.

Our walk with God is kind of like that too.  We so often search for God's will in our life. We read all the books.  (Just for fun, I went to christianbooks.com and typed in "God's will" in the search bar and got 14,815 results.)

Like physical fitness, searching for spiritual fitness is something sought after and researched. But as I studied the verses from 1 Thessalonians that are quoted above, something stood out to me.  This verse tells us what God's will is for all followers of Christ.  It is to be joyful, never stop praying and be thankful in all circumstances. 

But like physical fitness, we want to shortcuts.  We want to skip steps and get the same end results. We are thankful in most circumstances, joyful sometimes (if our kids are being good and the sun is shining), but only pray in front of others.  Yet, we get so frustrated when God doesn't seem to be moving in our life the way we expect. 

Doesn't that give you a fresh perspective on being thankful, prayerful and joyful?  It does for me. As much as I enjoy books and studies on learning and following God's will for my life, I'm going to get back to the basics and make the following the theme for my days:  "Erin, always be joyful.  Erin, never stop praying. Erin, be thankful in all circumstances. Erin, this is God's will for you.  Erin belongs to Christ Jesus."  Thanks to Melissa Taylor from Proverbs 31 ministries online bible studies for issuing this challenge :)

Deception of Perfection

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fear the Lord is to be praised."
               Proverbs 31:30


I have naturally curly, dark brown hair.  And each morning, when getting ready for the day, I like to make sure that each individual strand of hair is curled just so.  My main reason?  What if someone thought my hair wasn't naturally curly because of one hair not curling properly!  So because of this thought running through my head, I take extra care to check my hair at every angle.  Sounds a little ridiculous, right?  It's really not that anyone would think less of me if one hair was out of place, but I want to make sure that I don't look that way.

It's laughable, yes, but realistically, how often do we that with our homes, our kids, our vehicles and just our life in general.  There have been many times I've asked my husband to change shirts so people don't think I neglect my husband (and if you know my husband, he doesn't give one thought to the wrinkles, but will change for me).  We seek to deceive others, and sometimes ourselves, into thinking we're perfect.  We strive to make sure that the house "looks" neat and tidy to the naked eye, but hoping that no one looks too closely.  We make sure our child has a healthy snack at school, hoping they don't tell the teacher about the popcorn you gave them for supper last night.  We buy these things called "Spanx" to make sure those extra few cookies we indulged in don't show themselves through the pretty new sundress we got off the clearance rack at Wal-Mart.

We also spend a lot of time "researching" perfection.  How many of us buy those home decorating or organizing magazines that stare at us from the checkout line at the grocery store?  We see these while our kids are grabbing for the strategically placed candy bars or gum, and succumb to the temptation that this magazine, for only $4.99, will help us rearrange our lives to perfection.  And how many of us have seen or subscribe to blogs that will give us all sorts of tips on meal-planning, pantry organization and the perfect color of blue for your guest room.  Don't get me wrong, I love that we have a wealth of information at our fingertips, but what feelings do you come away with?  Do you feel inspired or depressed?  Hopeful or overwhelmed?

One of the biggest images of perfection that I've struggled with is the Proverbs 31 woman.  But, because I truly believe what Paul says in 2 Timothy 3:16, "All scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness," I cannot avoid Proverbs chapter 31.  This week I was reminded by Karen Ehman in her book, "Let. It. Go." that it does not say that this woman accomplished all of these things in one day or even by a certain age.

What a relief, because I've struggled so many times with why my house will never stay toy-clutter free (thanks to my beautiful, giggling 2 and 4 year-old princesses) like the ones in the magazines. Or why I can't get my act together and plan my meals days in advance.  Or why I'm not more organized with my time and make it to the gym to rid my waist of those extra cookies.  What I've have to remind myself it that I need my my priorities, to be God's priorities.  He wants me to be real.  No more deception of perfection. And to remind myself that for everything, there is a season.  He calls me to do my best each day.  And as we all know, His best is not the same as what the world deems as "best", so I need not bog myself down with images of the perfect home or the perfectly dressed children.

Someday I may have a well-organized home, pre-planned meals and dresses that don't need spanx hidden underneath.  And maybe, one of these days, I'll be able to let go of having the perfect head of curls.

Starting Fresh

To the woman He said, "I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children.  Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you."
            Genesis 3:16

A wife of noble character is her husband's crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.
            Proverbs 12:4


I always thought I had a pretty good handle on the submissive wife thing.  I had no problem allowing my husband to have the final say on the big things and trusting in his leadership according to how he thought God wanted us to proceed.  We'd discuss our options, I'd let him know what my thoughts were, but then I'd give it to him and to God. No biggy.

But heaven help him if he loaded the dishwasher wrong, put a diaper on a way that I didn't think was good enough, dressed one of our girls in yellow polka dots and pink stripes, etc.  You get the idea; I like things at home done my way!

In the last week, as I read the chapter entitled "Managing Your Man" in Karen Ehman's book "Let. It. Go.", I've come to see little more clearly how I am falling into the curse of sin that God spoke to Eve in Genesis 3:16.  I am desiring to control my husband.  It's a part of the curse that I had never looked at too closely.

Through Karen's writing and my other bible study, "True Woman 101" by Mary Kassian and Nancy Leigh DeMoss, I've felt God reveal to me that the way I speak and correct what my husband does, is more like the disgraceful wife in Proverbs 12:4.  And that is not what God created me, and women in general, for.  He has called us to be soft, nuturing, relational, welcoming and helpful.  These are strengths God has given to every woman.

God has designed women and men with different strengths.  Women's strengths are not more important than men's strengths, and vice versa.  God designed our strengths to compliment each other and together, display His glory in a marvelous and unique way.  So this just means that if I stay within my own strengths and not try to take over ones that my husband has been given by God, we will accurately display His glory.

Easier said than done, right?  Another aspect to my marriage that creates some unique challenges is that my husband and I are both firstborns.  This generally means we like things done our way because we each think that we know best and are the most trusted person for the job.  Can you say "Type A Personalities"?  That's us.  So this is why when Karen Ehman says to me in the book that "backing off and and not controlling your husband will feel foreign", I want to shout "Amen" because at least I'm not the only one that struggles with going again my natural tendencies! She also says that "the act of submitting is always a choice by and an action of the wife."  And praise the Lord that He gave me a husband that I'm not scared or afraid to submit to.

So today I'm starting fresh.  Seeking to be a bit softer and a bit less obsessive over the little things that I think aren't just the way they should be and focus on what God has given me.  He has given me a man who willingly tries to comb a little girls hair and dresses her sister to help me not be so rushed getting out the door.  He has given me a man who cooks supper if I'm too tired.  He has given me a man who makes sure my vehicle runs, has the best tires and gas in the tank.  He has given me a man who goes to work to provide for his family, works 12 hours and comes home to help me put two little girls to bed.  He has given me a man that I have never doubted his love for me.

Thank God for the blessing of my husband and help me be the wife of noble character that is my husband's crown.  And thank you Karen Ehman for enlightening me with this quote: "You see, if I had a perfect husband who could meet my every need, I would have no need for God."

I'm a control freak.

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." - 1 Peter 5:7

"He cares for those who trust in Him." - Nahum 1:7b

"Cast all your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall." - Psalm 55:22



I'm a control freak.  There is comfort in saying that.  Not in the way that I would say, "Hi, my name is Erin and I'm a control freak.  It's been 2 minutes since I tried to control someone."  It's more like there is comfort  in the label of being a control freak.  It could even be called a disclaimer, warning others that I'm in control and it's my way or the highway, whether they like it or not.  But how twisted is that!

Most of the time, there is comfort in what we know and for me, being in control is comfortable.  Exhausting, but comfortable.  I mean, really, what would my life look like if I was to really give every piece of my day to God.  Would the dishes still get done?  Would my kids be fed and dressed? Would the appointments be attended on time?  Does giving up control mean God will magically get my work done and give me time to sit with my feet up and read my Bible and sip my coffee while it's still warm?

It would be a lot easier for me to let go if this were true, but it's not.

But what does being in control even mean?  Does it mean that I can control my child's mood?  Do I control the weather?  Do I control the person who, very evidently does not have a child, takes the last parents' parking spot at Wal-Mart?  Do I control when my washing machine breaks down in the middle of a load of towels? No! I really can't and don't control any of those things.

So what is this illusion of control that I have and where does it come from?  Unfortunately, it comes directly from the same crafty serpent who tempted Eve with a piece of fruit.  Satan is still planting all those questions that cast doubt and plant seeds of independence from God today.  And even as I know this, why do I let myself get so wrapped up in "having control"?

All these are questions that I really don't have a very solid answer on...today.  But there is one thing that I do know.  God is in control whether I want to acknowledge it or not.  He's going to be there for me whether I give my day to Him or hold on to it for my own obsession.  And most importantly, He's not giving up on me.  I know His plan for me includes learning how to let go and trust Him fully with all aspects of my life.

And while I don't know, both practically and tangibly, what giving control looks like, I do know that it is a place that I want to be.  Even if my only reason for seeking this today is blind obedience and wanting to give Him the glory of my life, that's still a very good place to be.  As I focus on the verses listed at the top, I know my trust is in the right place.

God First

Do you ever question yourself when you think God is speaking to you?  Do you want to go running to a mirror and say to yourself, "Did you hear that too or was it just me?"

If I were to be honest with myself, and you, the above is usually my reaction.  And my next thought is, "What will others think if I tell them?" Why? Why should I care? Why should it matter?  Unfortunately, to me it does matter.  It shouldn't, but it does.  As I've examined that about myself, I've been faced with the realization that I've been putting what others think of me following God ahead of how God views me. Kind of twisted isn't it!

As I've gone through the journey of "Greater" by Steve Furtick with my online bible study group, I've felt the "Greater" call of God for obedience in two specific areas of my life.  The first being that I need to be using my writing skills, which is why you are able to read this right now.  I don't know where He is planning to take my writing, but I'm obeying.  Secondly, He has led me to take over the position of women's ministry leader in my home church.  This is an incredibly exciting, and scary, step for me, but again, I'm trusting and obeying.

So, as God has encouraged me to obey Him in these areas of my life, I've been faced with the "What will others think?" thoughts.  I've had to fight all tendencies to hide from others where He is leading me and not be afraid if they think me proud or self-righteous or arrogant.

I'm striving to place what my Father in Heaven thinks of me as my priority.  It's something I have to remind myself of everyday, but know that it's a lesson that need to learn.

Is there anything God is teaching you right now?